It’s My Party And I’ll Cry If I Want To – Get The Most Out Of Your Pity Party!

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Sweet, succulent pity. It’s the drug of choice amongst today’s chronically discontent. Tackling problems and conflicts head-on is a tiresome ordeal. Exerting your precious energy towards resolving challenges is not something an extraordinary individual such as yourself should EVER be expected to do. After all, is it not unreasonable to expect that your needs take priority and special concessions must be made to accommodate you–You fascinating, unique individual, you.

The world is oftentimes a cold, cruel place. Serving up heaping helpings of injustice upon you at a relentless pace. In many instances, nobody seems to understand. It is of utmost importance that you make your woes known!

Why address the chronic irritants in your own life when you can vehemently unleash your perpetual displeasure onto those around you? Ultimately, it’s everyone else’s fault you that feel the way you do, so why suffer in silence?

Remain steadfast in your unwillingness to evolve personally! Eventually, with hard work and perseverance, the world will eventually warp to your extraordinary narrative!

When people express pity towards you after enduring your zillionth whiny bitch-fest about the myriad of wrongdoings committed against you on a daily basis, it means they are true friends who really care. It is especially comforting when you share the same sources of victimization. Then you can engage in an orgy of boo-boo kisses and “I’m so sorry” with others who truly resonate and respect your plight.

If feels so good that it HAS to be good for you. It feels good to feel good and it feels great to endlessly vent your grievances, otherwise you might just accomplish something worthwhile! Spending your time doing meaningful things is totally pointless if you don’t have anyone present to acknowledge your pain n’ anguish experienced during them.

You are SPECIAL and when you experience difficulties others should coddle and pamper you. The world is a mean and horrible place and you didn’t make it that way. You’re just reacting accordingly to an unjust existence.

Enid Mozzer

Enid Mozzer

Enid is a 23-year-old student at the "School Of Hard Knocks", a phrase she insists she coined IN 2016. Self-diagnosed bipolar, with traits of dissacociative order, and sociopathy, Enid's writing comes from a feeling of duty, and compassion for her fellow woman. Ms Mozzer feels she generally knows what is best for others, and is happy to share these nuggets of wisdom. Unfortunately we cannot fire Enid as she somehow came into possession of photographs which depict the site's publisher in a compromising position. For this reason--and this reason alone--Enid gets free reign around here, and will likely put Every Woman Weekly out of business or have us embroiled in a heated lawsuit by year's end. Enid requests that we also add to her bio that she is currently single, and lives with her 7 cats in an RV parked on a portion of her parent's property. “Rent free”, she says. If you would be interested in dating Enid please email her here with a photo, detailed list of physical statistics, and at least three paragraph about about yourself, why Enid should date you, and what you expect/can provide in a long term relationship.

4 Comments

  1. I have NO problem throwing a pity party and if someone is my friend they will understand and talk me through it.

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